So, now I've had a day to think about things and get my head together. And I'll be spending a lot of time with my shrink tomorrow.

The good news is that I was terrified that I'd end up fighting with my stepmother and in fact we never fought at all and I have to say she was amazingly wonderful. Apparently they've changed her medication and it has done her a world of good.

Unfortunately I had no idea that my parents were bringing the Onceler with them.

This was a dude who - I am not fucking making this up - was bragging that he likes the Iraq and Afghan war because he makes artificial limbs and during times of war the demand for fake legs and arms are high.

This dude implied at one point that I was immoral for writing porn.

Anyway, most of the trip was good. Monday we hung in town and had a nice diner. On Tuesday we went to Palavas and had a nice day at the beach.

They wanted to go to Spain yesterday but the truckers held a strike where they shut down the highway between here and espagne.

So, instead we went to Aigues Mortes, which is a really nice walled city. The Iceman and the Non Jewish Carpenter met us there because they were doing some work in the region.

We had a great time and introduced them to Get 47 which is a regional after dinner drink. The Iceman offered to pay for everyone's meal but my mom wouldn't hear of it and insisted on paying.

I should note that while I went into my pocket to try to pay for my share, the Onceler didn't.

We then went back to Palavas where the two couples necked two bottles of wine in about ten minutes, making me terrified since I had to ride home with them.

They got us back into town safely and met up with Rome Girl and we decided to go to a vietnamese restaurant, because the Onceler had said that he'd heard that vietnamese restaurants are good in France.

It was there when I came out of the bathroom and my mom asked me to check on dad because he'd been outside for a while. I went out and he went on a long rant about how he wanted to slit my mom's throat and/or stab her in her sleep.

I then walked him back to the hotel, where he promptly passed out.

By the time I got back I'd mostly missed my meal and then when my mom went to pay they told her that their card processing system was down. So, my mom gave me her card and her pin number and I walked roughly a block in order to get the money out.

While I was gone the Onceler got into Miss Darling's face saying "Why don't you just fucking go home?"

I wish I'd known that at the time, because there are three people you can not fuck with as far as I'm concerned:

1. Rome Girl

2. Trixee

3. Miss Darling

If I'd known I would have broken the Onceler's nose. But this is the shit you find out later.

Instead he just gave me a huge load of shit telling me that as his "host" I should have paid for his meals instead of my parents paying for his meals.

The fucker is lucky that Rome Girl was standing next to me, because if I wasn't worried about embarrassing her I would have picked up a chair or table and broken it over his head. And that would have been just the beginning.

I didn't invite this fuckwit to Montpellier and if my mom wants to buy me dinner that's not his fucking business. Beyond that he never fucking went into his pocket this week. And, I ended up paying for him and his wife to explore the walled castle in aigues morte because they "forgot" to take money out. And my parents kept buying them meals and drinks for similar reasons. In fact it was Rome Girl and I who paid most of the tips everywhere we went, even though we kept saying to the Onceler "you should tip."

His response was "we'll never be back here, so why bother?"

This afternoon I was very tempted (knowing their flight number since they made me confirm their reservations) to make an annoymous call and describe him as a drug exporter, just to make him have to go through a body cavity search.

Rome Girl talked me out of this, but I will find a way to fuck this war profiteer somehow.

That said, my parents were great in the sense that this is the first time I've spent this much time with them in years without a fight happening between me and them.

And my step mom was a real lady.

Well, I was saving up these images for the July 4th contest, but it never happened.
So, here they are anyway, a day early since tomorrow you'll have better things to do,
like create fire hazards in your neighborhoods.

Or is that just me? Anyway, horrors:


Heil America!
( 7 more pictures under here )

Your result for The Commonly Confused Words Test...

English Genius

Take The Commonly Confused Words Test at HelloQuizzy

I've been lurking in this community for awhile but this is the first chance I had to post. I found this stuff in a dim, dark Value Village in Baltimore City. (It is a former 19th century warehouse.)

These owls will mesmerize you into looking behind the cut....



( Read more... )

Almost every person has something secret he likes to eat.

...It was then that I discovered little dried sections of tangerine. My pleasure in them is subtle and voluptuous and quite inexplicable. I can only write how they are prepared.

In the morning, in the soft sultry chamber, sit in the window peeling tangerines, three or four. Peel them gently; do not bruise them, as you watch soldiers pour past and past the corner and over the canal towards the watched Rhine. Separate each plump little pregnant crescent. If you find the Kiss, the secret section, save it for Al.

Listen to the chambermaid thumping up the pillows, and murmur encouragement to her thick Alsatian tales of l'intérieure. That is Paris, the interior, Paris or anywhere west of Strasbourg or maybe the Vosges. While she mutters of seduction and French bicyclists who ride more than wheels, tear delicately from the soft pile of sections each velvet string. You know those white pulpy strings that hold tangerines into their skins? Tear them off. Be careful.

Take yesterday's paper (when we were in Strasbourg L'Ami du Peuple was best, because when it got hot the ink stayed on it) and spread it on top of the radiator. The maid has gone, of course - it might be hard to ignore her belligerent Alsatian glare of astonishment.

After you have put the pieces of tangerine on the paper on the hot radiator, it is best to forget about them. Al comes home, you go to a long noon dinner in the brown dining-room, afterwards maybe you have a little nip of quetsch from the bottle on the armoire. Finally he goes. You are sorry, but -

On the radiator the sections of tangerines have grown even plumper, hot and full. You carry them to the window, pull it open, and leave them for a few minutes on the packed snow of the sill. They are ready.

All afternoon you can sit, then, looking down on the corner. Afternoon papers are delivered to the kiosk. Children come home from school just as three lovely whores mince smartly into the pension's chic tearoom. A basketful of Dutch tulips stations itself by the tram-stop, ready to tempt tired clerks at six o'clock. Finally the soldiers stump back from the Rhine. It is dark.

The sections of the tangerine are gone, and I cannot tell you why they are so magical. Perhaps it is that little shell, thin as one layer of enamel on a Chinese bowl, that crackles so tinily, so ultimately under your teeth. Or the rush of cold pulp just after it. Or the perfume. I cannot tell.

There must be someone, though, who understands what I mean. Probably everyone does, because of his own secret eatings.

This is kind of funny in a geek sort of way: youtube clip here... Also the kid's got a decent voice.

I was just thirty-four years old and I was still wandering in a haze
I was wondering why everyone I met seemed like they were
Lost in a maze

I don't know why I thought I should have some kind of
Divine right to the blues
It's sympathy not tears people need when they're the
Front page sad news.

The incense burned away and the stench began to rise
And lovers now estranged avoided catching each others' eyes

And girls who lost their children cursed the men who fit the coil
And men not fit for marriage took their refuge in the oil
No one respects the flame quite like the fool who's badly burned
From all this you'd imagine that there must be something learned

Slit skirts, Jeanie never wears those slit skirts
I don't ever wear no ripped shirts
Can't pretend that growing older never hurts.

Is Yahoo email driving anyone else crazy?

When I open up a new email - it flashes on the screen for a second, then disappears into a field of white. Happens to saved ones, new ones, doesn't matter. WTF?

EDIT: Never mind. As soon as I exposed the problem, it fixed itself. That's what you gotta do sometimes.

Mom,

I expect an apology from Bob tomorrow. His behavior was inexcusable.

I took three days off of work to try to make their trip nice.

To have it end up with my girlfriend working for me while I have an old man get in my face is bullshit.

Bob was way out of line last night.

I'm not a servant.

I loved being with you and dad, but Bob was awful.

They are your friends who came to my town so please make it right.

Bart

During diner tonight my dad took me outside and said "Your mother is pissing me off so much I want to slit her throat."

So, I took him back to his hotel and put him to bed.

Then I went back to the restaurant and my mom was freaking out because her card wouldn't work. Eventually I helped her figure out that the problem was that she had paid for everything over the past few weeks including all the bills for her friends.

So, while she has a million or so in her bank account her card was frozen.


So, I went out and got her card unfrozen and then used her card to pay for dinner. After that her friends - who have not paid for a dime since they got to montpellier took me aside. And the dude got physical with me and said "why the fuck didn't you pay for our meal tonight?"

The response was my mom asked me out to dinner and it's really not his bussness.

Plus, I took four days off of work to be a tour guide for my parents and this dude and his wife.

He's lucky I didn't throw a punch.

Only a month later but I am posting more pictures from that flea market in June. *waves little flag* This batch is slightly more offensive than the last batch so if you don't have a sense of humor or are easily offended I would avoid this post. ^.~

Okay, so I'm looking at seriously trying to cut costs, and I've noticed that couchsurfing seems to be the new backpacker's hostel, which sounds like a lot of fun... except I'm incredibly nervous at the prospect. Anyone care to share any experiences? And what does a typical request look like? I don't want to write people a thesis, but nor do I want to be too brief if it's not the norm. Any ideas?

 
Paper or Plastic?

My heart and prayers go out to you all suffering these massive fires - and to the men and women fighting them. 


Be safe.

In today's New York Times is a column by Mark Bittman the Minimalist. He doesn't write receipes so much as directions that if you'd been on your toes you might have thought of too. They're so sensible and simple and mouth-watering that you want to make them right away.

So. 101 picnics.

hi all,

i'm going to be in london in a couple of months and want to take a quick jaunt to gothenburg, sweden to see the gardens there. is it reasonable to fly from london in the morning, see the gardens, and then fly back in the evening? in my mind i'm thinking of the turn-around time like a day business trip from boston to DC or something like that, but i have no frame of reference for whether or not this is do-able. i've never been to london or sweden.

if this is reasonable, should i try flying to the gothenburg city airport (GSE) or stick with gothenburg-landvetter (GOT)? it looks like getting to GSE would be inexpensive, but would require flying out of london stanstead, which may not be very convenient.

thanks for sharing any advice and/or experiences.

Yesterday, I went to my local Goodwill because Monday is the best time to find new horror before people buy them and give them to distant relatives as birthday presents.

( In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups: the police who investigate crime, and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. These are their stories. CHUNG CHUNG. )

Whenever I'm really stressed I like to listen to Knocking on Heaven's Door as played by Guns N Roses in Chicago.

This really bothers Rome Girl in a couple ways:

1. When I get in this mood I want to play it like 5 or six times in a row.

2. She thinks it's a song about suicide and that terrifies her.

I wish there was a way I could convince her that it's simply a song that I like and that makes me happy when I'm sad.

That said, my shrink and I have talked bunches about my obsession with this song, so who the fuck knows. Maybe I shouldn't play it.

The agreement we have now is that I'll wear headphones.

Wow is it work intensive to try to start up a new laptop with Vista on it.

It's taken me an hour to get to the point where I can post on live journal.

We couldn't have a better neighbor!  We love you all, eh...

 

I'm planning a solo trip around Europe in May of next year. I'm buying the eurorail global month pass, and flying out from Toronto to Barcelona. My itinerary is:
Barcelona- Lyon - Geneva- Venice- Rome - Florence - Bern - Berlin - Amsterdam - Paris - Marseille - Barcelona.
That's a grand total of 6 countries in a little over a month. Does it sound do-able? Would I have enough time in each of these cities for sight-seeing?
I'm figuring around 4000 dollars for the budget, do you think it would be a lot more? I would love to see some of the smaller villages, not just capitals, any idea on how I should get to that?
Any suggestions or advice?
It will be my first time alone around Europe, and I am a 21 year old female.

ps-any suggestions on luggage? How much, type, etc?